You will run through a quick tutorial in your dorm room with guidance from Uncle Larry. When this is over, head out to the Dorm Hall.
Turn right and you will see a girl near the drinks table - Sally Mae. Examine her, then talk to her. Win the chat game, then go over to the drinks table and play a drink-mixing game. Go back to Sally Mae and chat to her a second time, then turn on the radio and dance with her. If you need help with this, visit the nearby vending machine and buy the Dance Album - you might need some money first, so you can play another drink-mixing game at the drinks table to earn some). Chat with Sally Mae a third time after dancing with her, and then talk to her again to start a game of Quarters. Talk to her once more and you will win her token of affection.
Head out to the hall again, then go around to the right and down the stairs, then outside to the main campus. After the Swingles cutscene, push over the lights around the Swingles stage and collect the super camera lens. Run past the hackey-sack guy and fart near him to distract him (just for fun). Go over the bridge, then up the stairs to the right and into the library. Go up the stairs and to the left, and chat to Ione.
Head out of the library and through the archway to the Greek Quad. Talk to the Commissar (the drunk guy) and win a dancing game to get the Cognac. Now go back to the Dorm Hall and into Luba and Ione's room (the one with the flashing lights). Make sure you search the drawer on the right to get the nail clippers. Talk to Ione to play a chat game, then talk to her again to start a game of Quarters. After winning, go back to her room for another chat, then talk to her again to start a makeover game. Win this to get Ione's token of affection.
Find Analisa outside the Frat House in the Greek Quad. Talk to her for a chat game, then again to play Quarters. Now you need to enter the Frat, and to do this, you need to give the bouncer $10. If you need more money, you can challenge Analisa to another game of quarters by using the table just here. Head into the Frat and talk to Analisa for another chat, then talk to her again for a trampoline game. You will automatically chat again, and then start an avoidance game, where you need to collect 10 keys and return to your Dorm. Don't forget you can use cheese mummies to distract the goons. You will now get Analisa's token of affection.
Talk to Big Daddy War Pig, who is near the fireplace in the Frat. Pay him $10 and you will play a trampoline game against Barbara Jo.
Go to the Swingles stage and talk to Uma to start the first Swingles challenge. Beat the trampoline challenge to reach the next phase of the game.
Head through the large doors to the left of the stage to leave the college campus. Head down the road and into the Power Station club.
You will find Luba at the bar - you will need to be drunk before talking to her, so buy some beers from the bartender. Talk to enter a chat game. Once you win this, head back to campus and talk to Luba at the trampolines to play a trampoline game. Go back to the club and find Luba for another chat. After the chat, sober up and then use the drinks station at the bar to mix her a drink. Talk to her again to start a game of Quarters, then you will automatically chat once more before getting her token of affection.
Go back to the Greek Quad and Zanna is standing between the cheerleaders and the Sorority. Talk to her to play a chat game, then you will automatically play an avoidance game where you must stay away from the INS agents (use your cheese mummies to distract them). Return to the Greek Quad again and chat to Zanna on the Sorority front porch, then talk again to play Quarters. You now need to buy the Snazzy Suit from the college guy by the Frat House so you can enter the Sorority and talk to Zanna again (use your black book to change clothes). Another chat game with Zanna is followed by a trampoline game - if you win this you will receive a token of affection.
Go back to the main campus and talk to Harriet outside the library - you will play a chat game Talk to her again to play Slaps against her (she bobs her hips before she slaps). Head to the Power Station club and talk to her again for another chat game. You will automatically start another chat back on campus. Talk to Harriet again to start a posing game, where you are dressed up as Twiggy. You need to get some school spirit from Harriet, then quickly run and distribute this to surrounding students - to succeed you will need to impress multiple people at once and use the time extends that are available. You will then automatically start a spanking game with Harriet, and when you win you will get her token of affection.
Frat Mixed Drinks
If you have won the previous Frat mission, talk to Big Daddy War Pig in the Frat and pay him $10 to play a drink-mixing game.
Go to the Swingles stage and talk to Uma to start the second Swingles challenge. Beat the dancing challenge with Analisa to reach the next phase of the game.
Enter the library and buy the geek outfit from the librarian. Now go down into the lab and talk to the good doctor in her office to the left. After her chat game, enter the main lab and use the Monkey Feed Room to start a bartending game, where you need to complete 5 stages to win. Go back to Beatrice and you will start a game of Quarters with Leopold the monkey. Talk to Beatrice again for 2 consecutive chat games, then a whack-a-pole game. When you win, you get an object of affection.
Go back to the main campus and talk to Charlotte, who is holding the megaphone. After the chat game, talk to her again to start a bartending game with animal rights flyers. Play another chat game, then talk again to play a game where you must spray-paint the alpha bull statue. Talk to her again for another chat, and you will automatically start an avoidance game where you must escape with the monkey. You will then get another token of affection.
Buy the preppy outfit, then enter the Plaid Mart in Crappy Streets, and talk to Bilzarbra for a chat game. You will automatically start a tantrum game to enter the Spartacus gay bar. Win this to get inside, so you can start another chat game with Bilazarbra. You can also perform several jobs at the bar while you are here. When you are done, head to Nice Streets and go inside the art gallery. Enter the classroom on the right and start a photo shoot game (you need at least 3-4 lights per photo). You will then start a chat automatically, and then go on to an acting game. When you win this you will get a token of affection.
If you have won the previous Frat missions, talk to Big Daddy War Pig in the Frat and pay him $10 to play a posing game where you must convince 10 girls to come to a frat party, without inviting any guys along.
Talk to the Commissar near the Plaid Mart to play a game where you must take photos of Sweet Lou (best way is to take zoomed in photos of her butt with the super camera lens to get 5-light photos). Speak to him again and you will have a chat game with Sweet Lou.
Talk to the pimp near the door to Spartacus, and you will have a posing game where you need to convince 12 girls to work for him within a set time limit.
Go to the Swingles stage and talk to Uma to start the third Swingles challenge. You need to deliver bad comments to 8 guys hanging around the main campus. Return to Uma after delivering some bad news to recharge.
Make sure you have a full snazzy suit from the college guy in the Greek Quad, then talk to Tilly, who is standing next to a bench nearby. After the chat with her, enter the Frat House to play a photo game where you need to get 6 photos of Scott while he poses (3 or 4-stars lights per photo).
Head to the Sorority House and enter Tilly's office, then talk to her for a chat game. Next go to Nice Streets and talk to Tilly outside the Art Gallery. The next game involves running around the art gallery and peeing on the paintings - you can "reload" by drinking some more water downstairs. After this challenge you will automatically start another chat game with Tilly. Head to Crappy Streets and talk to her outside Lefty's Too to activate an avoidance game where you need to collect parts of a decoder. Once you succeed you will get her token of affection.
Go to Nice Streets and talk to Koko, the mime. After a chat game you will go straight into a posing game where you need to mime for 12 people. Follow Koko into the Art Gallery and talk to her behind the counter for a chat game. Talk to her again to start a photo shoot session, where it is easiest to get 4 or 5-star photos by zooming in on her face. Next go to the art classroom and talk to Koko to start a painting game. Chat with her successfully once more to receive her token of affection.
Go to the Spartacus gay bar in Crappy Streets. You need the cool outfit from the vending machine outside. Wear this and talk to Guy Dahm the bartender to play a bartending game. After 4 waves of this, talk to him again for a chat game. After a second automatic chat game, talk to Ione to start a dancing game. Talk to Ione for yet another chat, then you will start a streaking game, where you need to streak 12 people and avoid Helmut before reaching the exit. You will now get another token of affection.
Frat Panty Raid
If you have won the previous Frat missions, talk to Big Daddy War Pig in the Frat and pay him $10 to play an avoidance game. Go upstairs in the Sorority house and collect 30 pairs of panties, then run out through the door to complete the game.
Go to the Swingles stage and talk to Uma to start the fourth Swingles challenge. You need to shoot the girls in the chest when they move their arms to the side - this is much easier if you have purchased the squirt gun from Plain Mart.
Make sure you have a full preppy outfit, then talk to Barbara Jo inside the Sorority House for a chat game. Talk to her again for a trampoline game, then talk to her again to get a hint. Return to your dorm room and use your phone to call Barbara Jo and start another chat. Go back to the Sorority House and talk to her again to engage in a wet t-shirt contest at Lefty's Too. Return to the Sorority House and talk to her to start another chat, then you will play a game of Quarters. Win this to get her token of affection.
Go to the library and talk to Morgan, up the second flight of stairs. Go down and use the coffee machine near Nigel then go back and speak to her again (with your full geek outfit from the librarian). You will have 2 consecutive chat games, then play strip slaps and have another chat. You will then automatically play a streaking game, and if you win you will get Morgan's token of affection.
Start by talking to Lucius, the bouncer at the VIP room in the Powerstation Dance Club in Nice Streets. Next go and talk to Julius, the bouncer outside the Titty City Strip Club in Crappy Streets. Go to the Spartacus gay bar and you will start a photo shoot game where you need to get 5-star photos of Helmut's crotch. Leave Titty City and return to the Dance Club, and talk to Lucius again to play a handshake game.
Now head into the VIP room and wear your full cool outfit, then talk to Suzi. After the chat game you will need to distribute flyers. Outside the club, chat with Suzi again, then talk to her to play a music game. Once you win, talk to Suzi again for another chat (she is either on stage or by the dance club. Talk to her again for a spanking game and she will give you her token of affection.
If you have won the previous Frat mission, talk to Big Daddy War Pig in the Frat and pay him $10 to play a streaking game. You need to streak past 15 people and return to the Frat house to complete this series of missions.
You can find Russell outside Ione and Luba's room in the Dorm Hall. Talk to him to start the makeover game. After you succeed you can find him again in the Dorm Hall to buy some special items.
Go to the Swingles stage and talk to Uma to start the final Swingles challenge. You will automatically start a long chat at Titty City. You will need to select a girl to remove from the contest. Now there is a dance contest with the remaining two girls. Eliminate another girl and you will see an ending sequence.
After watching the credits, talk to Uma on the Swingles set for another chat game. Go and look through the Sorority House peep hole to see some girls in the shower. Find Larry in Lefty's Too to buy any remaining bonus items, including the Everybody Naked item and the alternate endings.
There are 10 porn fairies scattered throughout the game. They are all activated after the first one, which only appears in Phase Two of the main game.
- Magazine on the ground by the Sorority House peep hole
- Magazine by the rack in the library
- Magazine in niche opposite library stairs
- Magazine by the bushes near the railroad track in Nice Streets
- Upstairs door in the Sorority House
- Magazine in Crappy Streets back alley
- Magazine in Crappy Streets dead end by vending machine
- Upstairs painting in Art Gallery
- Magazine by sketches in Art Classroom
- Magazine by the spanking cross in VIP room
There are 105 items to collect throughout the game. The following bonus items are available from Nigel/Russell/Larry Laffer at various points through the game:
- Bonus Art 1-7 (from Nigel/Russell)
- Loading Screens 1-5 (from Nigel)
- Strip Items 1-10 (from Nigel)
- Nude Models 1-17 (from Nigel/Russell)
- Naughty Girls 1-6 (from Nigel/Russell/Porn Fairy)
- Everybody Naked (from Larry Laffer)
- Endings 1-3 (from Porn Fairy 3)
These items improve your chances of winning the mini-games, and are available from various vending machines and merchants:
- Dance Album (for dancing)
- Springy Shoes (for trampoline)
- Canadian Quarter (for quarters)
- Tube of Lotion (for whack-a-pole)
- Gauntlets (for slaps)
- Squirt Gun (for wet t-shirts)
- Baby Oil (for streaking)
- Spanking Paddle (for spanking)
- Bar Diploma (for bartending)
- Mini Paint Roller (for painting)
- Makeup Kit (for makeovers)
- Acting Video (for acting games)
- Twiggy Plush Doll (for twiggy games)
- Invisible Box (for miming)
The following items also improve your chances at the games, but are harder to locate:
- Nail Clippers (for handshake game, you need to get this from Luba and Ione's room in the Dorm Hall, during the Ione missions in Phase One)
- Super Camera Lens (for taking zoomed-in photographs, this appears if you push over all the lights near the Swingles stage on main campus)
- Def Leppard Arm (for rock-and-roll game, from the Porn Fairy in the back alley in Crappy Streets)
- Judd's Number (for tantrum game, from the Porn Fairy near the vending machine in Crappy Streets)
- Wings of Hermes (for avoid games, from the Porn Fairy in the library)
There are several extra outfits you can obtain:
- Cool outfit (for Lesbian Ione and Suzi) - Bitchin Gloves, Pocket Chain, Handle Bar Heaven, Studly Hat
- Geek Outfit (for Beatrice and Morgan) - Bow Tie, Calculator Watch, Pocket Protector, Thick Glasses
- Preppy Outfit (for Barbara Jo) - Shoulder Sweater, Beeper, Expensive Watch, Visor
- Snazzy Suit (for Zanna and Tilly) - Formal Tie, Fake Carnation, Fake Moustache, Snazzy Hat
- Mime Outfit (from Koko's mime mission)
- Twiggy Costume (from Harriet's mascot mission)
Finally, each of the 13 girls will give you a token of affection:
- Fish Paper (from Analisa)
- School Panties (from Barbara Jo)
- Colobus Sample (from Beatrice)
- Signed Glossy (from Bilzarbra)
- Das Kapital (from Charlotte)
- Jaw Harp (from Harriet)
- Teddy Bear Head (from Ione)
- Double Dong (from Lesbian Ione)
- Jumbo Wiener (from Koko)
- Beer Bong (from Luba)
- Dice Bag (from Morgan)
- Cowboy Hat (from Sally Mae)
- Brass Knuckle (from Suzi)
- Charred Skull (from Tilly)
- Jar of Borscht (from Zanna)